barefoot "Contestant."

That's what he calls me when I make something superbly out-of-the-ordinary. Which makes me laugh, because he does it on purpose and yet, it's so spontaneous.

Which reminds me of a Christmas Story...no, not the Ralphie story, this is my own sordid story.

Christmas 2008, we bought this cookbook for my Mom, who in case you didn't know, is a Southun Belle. Mom really likes Ina Garten, because Ina seems like a genuine person.

This past Christmas, I decided that Mom should have a "theme" Christmas and the theme I chose for her was "Kitchen Gadgets." A perfect idea for the woman who worked full-time for many years, managed the laundry, cooking, cleaning, gardening, etc., while raising her four children. Sorry, Mom.

A kitchen theme meant another Ina cookbook. I went to the bookstore and purchased the lone BC cookbook remaining on the shelf. I took the book home and wrapped it, thinking I was so lucky to get the last BC cookbook...

Stopping by my parent's house shortly after my big coupe, I looked down on the coffee table and there, staring at me, was Ina...the same Ina I had just bought, that I had given as a gift to Mom the year before. Seems my total recall wasn't working too well! *Duh*

I went to another bookstore and to my relief, there was a wider variety of BC cookbooks. And this Barefoot Contessa Family Style cookbook looked great. I was sure that Mom would love it. But then, my eyes caught this...

The Cracker Kitchen, a collection of stories and recipes of the pioneer "crackers" who settled the South. I sat on the bench and read excerpts from several chapters, laughing over the folksy stories and recipes.

Perfect for my Southun Belle Mom, I bought it. I returned the duplicate Ina cookbook and went ahead and kept the second BC cookbook for myself, because it was Christmas and I deserved it!

So you see, the mayhem all turned out perfectly. Mom has a Southern cookbook that she's going to have to adjust all recipes to for modern day eating and me, I have a cookbook that needs absolutely no modification.

Yeah, sorry about that, too, Mom.